Timber Falls
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DVD details
Actor: Brianna Brown, Josh RandallBrand: Universal Studios
DVD: Region Code 1
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language)
Format: Color, DVD, NTSC, Widescreen
Picture Format: 1.33:1
Running Time: 100 minutes
DVD Release Date: 2008-05-13
Audience Rating: R (Restricted)
Studio: Rifkin Eberts
Product features:
- The theatrical thriller Timber Falls features a religious serial killer intent on harvesting babies from the sexy women he kidnaps. Format: DVD MOVIE Genre: HORROR Rating: R Age: 883476002224 UPC: 883476002224 Manufacturer No: RE0222DVD
DVD Reviews of Timber Falls
DVD Review: Are you kidding me lady?
Summary: 2 Stars
It's become fashionable lately to name horror movies after a location. Maybe all the good horror names have been used up, maybe the writers lack creativity, or maybe it's just easier to remember. The latest in this string of peculiar American towns is Timber Falls.
Now, "Timber Falls" sounds a little bit silly, because all I can think of is someone shouting "TimmmmmBEEERRRRRRR!" as a tree falls. But maybe that's a point, because there's a lot of silliness going on in Timber Falls.
Timber Falls features a disfigured and deranged killer, a crazy family with a bizarre ideology, and "normal" folk who are secretly in league with the crazies. It's Misery meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Where Timber Falls distinguishes itself is the reason for the family's actions. TIMBER ALERT: I'm going to be felling a lot of spoiler trees in a moment.
There's lawman Clyde (Nick Searcy), who also happens to be the father of this insane clan. He may look normal, but he's actually the patriarch of a breeding program committed to producing a child for his beloved Ida (Beth Broderick). Ida has been driven mad by her repeated attempts at having children, the film's primary creepy moment encapsulated in the aborted fetuses collected in her basement. And tacked onto this bunch is Deacon (Sascha Rosemann), Ida's brother - a deformed, deranged serial killer.
Deacon is the muscle in this little operation dedicated to finding a new child for Ida and Clyde. Their master plan: find good breeding stock (i.e. stupid city people screwing around in the woods), ensure they aren't "living in sin" by marrying them if need be, and then forcing them to procreate until a baby arrives. It's not a particularly good plan, given that the first couple in the opening scenes dies rather than comply. But without a lot of stupidity Timber Falls wouldn't be much of a movie.
Into this mess stumbles Sheryl (delicious Brianna Brown) and Mike (Josh Randall). They're on a romantic hiking trip and think nothing of going off into uncharted territory - Timber Falls in this case. When they come across a group of sadistic hunters who threaten to 1) molest Sheryl, 2) steal her clothes, 3) wave shotguns in their faces, and 4) blackmail the couple into buying some moonshine...Mike chooses to pay them off rather than reach for his concealed handgun. Sheryl, in the height of stupidity, demands Mike remove all the bullets from his gun.
Now I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure the trip's over, right? The hunters did everything but actually assault the couple. Get rid of the gun? Are you kidding me lady?
Predictably, Sheryl is kidnapped and Mike goes on a tear to retrieve her. He then is 1) skewered by a sharp stick in the arm, 2) snared in a bear trap, 3) shot, 4) stabbed in the gut, and 5) tortured repeatedly. Throughout, Mike is defiant, hurling insults at his captors even though he and Sheryl are tortured until they comply. Somebody should tell Mike he's in a horror movie.
There's so many problems with Timber Falls. Deacon - who exists to menace the couple as Clyde and Idea are clearly not scary enough -- seems to be tacked on from another movie. Sheryl and Mike are dumb as rocks. And the ending sets up Timber Falls for a sequel it didn't earn.
The sad thing is that Timber Falls had potential - the contrast between city and country folks, the uncomfortable probing questions about religion from a young couple who probably hasn't thought much about settling down, and the idea of becoming brutalized in rural America...these are all scenes that build up dread. It's just that Timber Falls isn't sure what to do with its raw material.
Description of Timber Falls
The theatrical thriller Timber Falls features a religious serial killer intent on harvesting babies from the sexy women he kidnaps. In the tradition of some of Stephen King?s Desperation.Bestsellers in DVD
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