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Sinbad - Legend of the Seven Seas (Full Screen Edition) by Patrick Gilmore (III), Tim Johnson
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DVD detailsActor: Brad Pitt, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Dennis Haysbert, Joseph Fiennes, Michelle Pfeiffer Director: Patrick Gilmore (III), Tim Johnson Brand: Paramount DVD: Region Code 1 Audio: English (Unknown); English (Subtitled); French (Subtitled); Spanish (Subtitled); English (Original Language); French (Dubbed); Spanish (Dubbed) Format: AC-3, Animated, Closed-captioned, Color, Dolby, DTS Surround Sound, Dubbed, DVD, Full Screen, Live, NTSC, Subtitled Picture Format: 1.33:1 Running Time: 86 minutes DVD Release Date: 2003-11-18 Audience Rating: PG (Parental Guidance Suggested) Studio: Dreamworks Animated
DVD Reviews of Sinbad - Legend of the Seven Seas (Full Screen Edition)DVD Review: Scheherazade Is Rolling Summary: 1 Stars
It's difficult to put into words how much I loathe this movie.
This half-baked story involves a "Book of Peace" being stolen by Eris, Greek Goddess of Chaos (aka Hades Lite), who frames Sinbad for the crime. He is going to be killed, but his goody-two-shoes bud Proteus steps in. Proteus agrees to be "substituted" for Sinbad, setting Sinbad free on one condition: that he'll retrieve the Book of Peace. Unfortunately for Proteus, by substituting himself for Sinbad, he also takes on that pesky death sentence. If Sinbad doesn't return, he dies. So Sinbad galumphs off to save Proteus with his crappy sidekick dog and his PC crew. Proteus' fiance Marina stows aboard to crack the whip, because who else will lecture everybody on how women are just as good as men? Then she instantly attains +1000 sailing points in a moment of enlightenment (because her name is Marina, GET IT) and is suddenly capable of piloting this boat without any help but that of aforesaid crappy sidekick dog. There are many lame placeholder fights, forced character changes, horrible dialogue ("Who's bad? Sin-BAD!"), and horrible voice acting.
Let's take a look at the animation. Horrid. Jarring, crappy CG elements are easily picked apart from their traditionally animated counterparts; they simply look too different from each other and never meld to form a competent whole. Character designs were bland and instantly forgettable, and stylistic elements sometimes appeared more like deformations (for example, Sinbad has unfortunate stumpy elephant legs). Colors were just as jarring and cheap looking. For the first time, I feel led to comment on the characters' clothing -- it was all so, well... blah. Almost like the clothes were drawn on as a second thought, and almost never fitting or interesting. When all is said and done, judging by animation alone, Sinbad looked for all the world like an ambitious Saturday morning cartoon.
That said, there are a few moments where the animation shines. The sea of sand stands out in particular, and Eris' transformations and magic are sometimes quite good. These shining moments, unfortunately, are few and far between.
Secondly, I hated all of the characters. They were practically forced together. Proteus was far too good; I did not understand his friendship with Sinbad at all. Marina was our necessary feminist lecturer (bleagh, why?). Sinbad was a jerk, a shallow and unlikable one; and before anyone says, "That's the point!", may I bring up Jack Sparrow and the protagonists of Road to El Dorado? It's possible to be likable and a ruffian; Sinbad fails this, and miserably, too.
I also want to stress my hatred of the politically correct crew on board Sinbad's ship. Every single person is of a different race, which is downright goofy in the ancient era where Sinbad is set. Not only is there a samurai hangin' out on board (what?), there's a Mexican guy with an obnoxious accent and an even more obnoxious name ("Rat"). Rat's existence is mind-boggling, because Sinbad is, you know, IN THE MEDITERRANEAN. In the ancient days. By ancient days, I mean, "b.c.". You can't even say that Rat is from Spain because back then, Spain and Spanish didn't exist. Look, multicultural arrangements are great... if they make sense, if they're natural and not forced and preachy. But in ye olden dayes, they just weren't all that common; those Chinese twins would have had to cross thousands and THOUSANDS of miles by foot and camel just to sail with Sinbad (Equal Opportunity Employer). I'm so sick of obvious PC pandering; how many people really think that if a multicultural group isn't portrayed, kids are going to go crazy and join the KKK?
The greatest sin is the story, which is unimaginative, uninspired, and NOT linked to the original Sinbad in any way at all. The original Sinbad is a Muslim out of the Middle East; this Sinbad is in, uh, Ancient Greece? That's when I realized that Sinbad's name was the only thing carrying this movie. It was just tagged on there because it was instantly recognizable. Without it, nobody would remember this movie. That's because it hasn't an ounce of originality or a story worth squat. I can't believe that the producers of this dreck didn't think to take from the rich world of the 1001 Nights... oh, that would have taken too much effort, I suppose. All that bothersome reading!
There is no reason to watch this. It is the epitome of lazy animation. You won't even want to let your kids watch the awful thing because of the double entendres, and chances are they'll get bored at the forced romance. There's just nothing redeemable about this.
Skip this one. Watch some Disney flicks.
More Sinbad - Legend of the Seven Seas (Full Screen Edition) reviews: 1 2
Description of Sinbad - Legend of the Seven Seas (Full Screen Edition)The sailor of legend is framed by the goddess eris for the theft of the book of peace and must travel to her realm at the end of the world to retrieve it and save the life of his childhood friend prince proteus. Studio: Paramount Home Video Release Date: 02/13/2007 Starring: Voices Of Brad Pitt Michelle Pfieffer Run time: 86 minutes Rating: Pg
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