Rhinestone
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Actor: Dolly Parton, Richard Farnsworth, Ron Leibman, Sylvester Stallone, Tim ThomersonDVD: Region Code 1
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language)
Format: Color, DVD, NTSC, Widescreen
Picture Format: 2.35:1
Running Time: 111 minutes
DVD Release Date: 2005-03-22
Audience Rating: PG (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Studio: Starz / Anchor Bay
DVD Reviews of Rhinestone
DVD Review: Worth it for the "Drinkenstein" song
Summary: 3 Stars
As Sylvester Stallone's film acting career winds down, I get all nostalgic and tend to look more favorably even at his clunkers. Case in point, this film. When you think of legendary screen pairings, you don't think much of Sly Stallone and Dolly Parton. Yet, here they are, in RHINESTONE, a Pygmalion-like romantic comedy. Back in the day (that would be 1984), Sly had just done ROCKY III and FIRST BLOOD, his star ascending like a mothereffer. RHINESTONE was a change of pace for Sly and his first attempt not only at comedy but at romantic comedy, and when I first saw it during its theatrical run, I was stunned, and not in a good way. But I've seen this flick a number of times since then, and while familiarity does breed contempt, sometimes it also takes the edge off that initial pang of "What The Eff Is This!"
It's a bare-bones premise: With more than just her contract on the line, a country western singer makes a bet with her creepy horndog manager that she can turn anyone into a country western star within two weeks. She ends up stuck with a coarse New York cabbie and brings him to her Tennessee home for the hasty tutorial on hillbilly. After which, he has to perform before (and survive) a tough, rowdy crowd at a popular New York honkytonk nightclub.
So what's more horribly fish-out-of-water than Sly stranded in backwoods Tennessee while striving to channel his inner hick? Where even the local hayseeds remark that "He's slow-witted, ain't he?" Sly's brash cabbie doesn't dig country music, thinking it "worse than liver," and, yeah, when he tries to sing country I tend to agree with him. He talks and sings like he has marbles in his mouth and, on stage, twitchy dude needs to take some Calm Down pills. But the biggest flaw is that the characters in the movie, in the end, seem to buy into Sly being a credible singer (Dolly's manager even sounds him out about a contract). Sly co-writes the screenplay and he throws in so many bad caricature moments that the film was destined for universal panning. Dolly Parton is sweet and can really sing but her presence can't balance out the cliched cornpone and pasta.
And yet, much to my shame, the last few times I've seen RHINESTONE, I've enjoyed the watching of it. The caveat, I think, is that you have to like the two leads some, or, else, you'll only get the bejesus irked out of you. If you like Dolly Parton, then it's fine, because she's good in her typecast role. If you like Stallone, then you might get a kick out of watching him attempt a southern drawl and a jock itch strut and also his being all gigged out in gaudy attire (and I'm not even referring to his country-western outfits, but his normal 1980s wear). The "Drinkenstein" scene (in which a rainbow throws up on him) happens to be one of my favorite Stallone moments ever. Although the funniest song is probably "The Day My Baby Died," belted out by that face-scarred would-be cowpoke singer. And, for folks who dig the TRANCERS series, Jack Deth himself (Tim Thomerson) has a supporting role as Dolly's ex (but he loses some man points by getting clocked by Dolly).
In the Stallone comedy ouevre, this one isn't as large a suckfest as STOP! OR MY MOM WILL SHOOT but not as good as Oscar. RHINESTONE is a train wreck, yep, but the weird dichotomy is that its backhanded saving grace is also what capsizes it, namely Sylvester Stallone as country singer. Me, I ended up placing this flick on the Guilty Pleasure shelf of my DVD collection. It really all depends on if you can be forgiving enough, of the cheese and stereotypes and "Hopalong Meatball"'s mugging and shatteringly bad singing (which to me is what makes the "Drinkenstein" song so awesome).
It's from neither Shakespeare nor Jane Austen, but I dig the lyrics: "Budweiser, you created a monster. And they call me Drinkenstein. And they call me Drinkensteeeein!"
Yeah!
Description of Rhinestone
Jake (Dolly Parton) is a down-home Country singer with enormous talents. Nick Martinelli (Sylvester Stallone) is a New York City cabbie with an even bigger attitude. But when Jake bets her sleazy manager everything ? and she means everything ? that she can turn anybody into an overnight sensation, that somebody turns out to be Nick. Now Jake must haul Nick back to the hills of Tennessee for a two-week crash course in how to walk, talk and sing like a genuine Country star. Can a tough talkin? hillbilly gal with everything to lose and a slick city guy who hits all the wrong notes finally find a way to make beautiful music together? Ron Leibman (NORMA RAE) and Richard Farnsworth (THE STRAIGHT STORY) co-star in this wild comedy from the director of PORKY?S and A CHRISTMAS STORY, co-written by Sylvester Stallone and featuring a hot soundtrack of songs written and performed by Dolly Parton.Bestsellers in DVD
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