Chairman of the Board
by Alex Zamm
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DVD details
Actor: Courtney Thorne-Smith, Larry Miller, Mystro Clark, Raquel Welch, Scott 'Carrot Top' ThompsonDirector: Alex Zamm
Brand: Lions Gate
Writer: Alex Zamm
Producer: Brad L.C. Greenberg
Producer: Edward K. Phillips
Producer: Mark Amin
Producer: Peter M. Lenkov
Writer: Al Septien
Writer: Turi Meyer
DVD: Region Code 1
Audio: English (Unknown), Dolby Digital 2.0 Surround; Spanish (Subtitled); French (Subtitled); English (Original Language), Dolby Digital 2.0 Surround
Format: Closed-captioned, Color, DVD, Full Screen, Letterboxed, NTSC, Widescreen
Picture Format: 1.85:1
Running Time: 95 minutes
DVD Release Date: 1998-08-11
Audience Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Studio: Lions Gate
DVD Reviews of Chairman of the Board
DVD Review: Norm Macdonald Was Right
Summary: 2 Stars
"Chairman of the Board" bothers me. No, not just because of Carrot Top, who only looked marginally unattractive in this movie before he had his hideous facial surgery. It's everything about this movie, even from the very start. It started with the birthing scene, where a toddler wearing a wig is playing with testtubes inside his mother's womb, and then he made a chemical explosion that didn't kill him and his mother but just rocketed himself out of the womb. That baby is named Edison (Carrot Top), who in years later became a freelance inventor (inventor, Edison, get it?); he made a lot of crazy products but none of them work. Not wanting for him and his friends to be evicted by a smoke-addict lady with a microphone, he worked in several jobs like being a crash-test dummy. Soon to be out of luck, he found an old man on the road whose car is stalled; Edison fixed the car, and then the two hanged out. Later, he got a invitation to a will because the same old man suddenly passed on, and because they chatted for one day, the old man left his entire business estate to Edison and not to someone with experience.
Oddly enough, those are the highest points of the film. I was rather amused by Edison's antics, although in a terrifying nightmarish way. When he was auditioning for a play in Annie and he was getting beat up by little girls dressed up like Annie, that moment kind of put a smile on my face. When it comes to his iconic props (i mean, 'inventions'), they're certainly creative; ineffective but creative. It's only when he became the CEO of a conglomerate that the "Board" got bored. At that point, Carrot Top's eccentricity quickly fizzled and lost direction, and I because distraught by the amount of implausibility behind the characters and the situations.
Carrot Top tried to imitate Jim Carrey but ended up being Tom Green. All he's doing is desperately finding anything he could grab his hands on, and act like a 7-year-old with the objects in place; it's not like he's committing physical antics out of misunderstanding, he's doing this as if to get the audience's attention, which isn't the right approach to comedy. Just because someone acts insane and being random, that doesn't mean people are going to laugh at that person by their basic principles. I hated "Freddy Got Fingered", but it had jokes that I didn't see coming, whereas this film had gags that I already knew would happen. This is insultingly predictable in how the jokes are going to set up and what results they'll bring. Every time Raquel Welch appears, there's a hokey saxaphone in the background. When the old man was gonna mention what he's gonna leave his stubborn old nephew (played by resident jerk Larry Miller) to his will, I knew exactly what he's gonna say. When Carrot Top is in a fixed camera position to where the automatic tennis ball machine is, I know he's gonna accidentally hit it, activate the machine and the ball will shoot someone in the family jewels. There's a lot of nut-busting jokes to repeat, along with the easy running gag of the nephew car's being damaged; it wasn't funny the first time, and the progressive damage is not going to make me care.
And then there are the inventions that Edison made, which range from useless to impossible to ripping-off; there's already a smokeless cigarette and glow-in-the-dark Gak on the market. He made a JACK-in-a-box that shouldn't even lift the car, he made a portable toilet that's less feasible than just wearing a diaper, and lest we forget his most improbable invention: the portable TV/TV dinner combo, which self-heats the food and has a workable TV inside. The combo is sold in freezers, and electronics need room temperature to work; the product would short-circuited, and even if put in the counter and the microwave is concealed, people would still feel the heat from the exterior...and the heat to cook the meals would burn people's hands. And how would the TV work for four hours in a small package without large amounts of batteries? That product shouldn't even work, let alone selling such an expensively-produce item for no more than a pack of Altoids.
I was stuck watching an endless ineptitude of a one-note clown. "Chairman of the Board" is an insane asylum of worthless jokes that amount to nothing more than to make Carrot Top act childish but never charming. It's less funny than it is intolerant, with many characters that are just too psychotic to even accept his sporadic behavior, even Courtney Throne-Smith who falls in love with him after he showed her his chia-pet-hair invention. Too stupid to laugh, too pointless to care.
Description of Chairman of the Board
CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD - DVD MovieEdison (Carrot Top) is a surfing would-be inventor who makes goofy Rube Goldberg-style gadgets. Here's a taste: a drinking glass with a forehead heater to prevent brain freeze. They're all pretty much like that. The chairman of a large corporation (Jack Warden), who had shown interest in Edison's "ideas," dies and leaves Edison in charge of his company. Another would-be benefactor (Larry Miller), beaten out of his inheritance by Edison, makes it his evil mission to wrest control of the company from the ne'er-do-well with the shock of silly hair. A thin formula on which to hang some amazingly unfunny gags, all done in a broad cartoon-style, but with no flair. Puts the stupid in Stupid Comedy, then takes out all the comedy. Well, okay, not all. The videotaped will takes the form of a game show, presenting things to be inherited as prizes in the manner of Wheel of Fortune, complete with its own Vanna White. The rest is one lame attempt at a joke after another, with some time taken for Carrot Top to do pale imitations of Jim Carrey, possibly unintentionally. Highlights include Cindy Margolis. --Jim Gay
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